Owl – The Sanctuary of Vindos

I know this chakra far too well –
it’s a monkey wrestling with an owl.
Only when the chatter ends
can I access deeper wisdom.

When I’ve been exploring the issues I’m experiencing in all the other chakras they have led me up, through the nervous system, to my brain where I believe many of my problems with disregulation stem from.

The brow chakra is associated with the mind, both its thinking and intuitive capacities and is viewed in the yogic tradition as the command centre.

I’ve done a lot of research into the brain and thought, at first, my troubles stem from my hypothalamus, which is the control station for so many of our bodily functions such as sleep, hormone regulation, autonomic nervous system.

Yet, when I did some journeywork around this I got told by my hyopthalamus that it’s only doing it’s job based on signals from other brain parts. Through a combination of journeys and research I discovered that I’ve got an enlarged overactive amygdala, our inner alarm bell, whose constant ringing keeps telling my hypothalamus to put me into a sympathetic ‘fight or flight’ state. My anterior cingulate cortex, which is responsible for attention, emotional awareness, self control and behavioural adaptability, is underdeveloped.

I’m also subject to getting to stuck in the ‘worry loop’ (a tract of neurons running in a circle from the pre-frontal cortex to the striatus to the thalamus and back linking to the limbic system (which includes the amygdala). For me this manifests as worrying constantly about financial security and being unable to cope if I cannot make a living from my vocation. These thoughts keep my amygdala sounding the alarm bell and result in adrenaline and cortisol constantly coursing through my body, which has led to my overactive inflammation response causing conditions such as rosacea, eczema, tendinopathy and IBS along with Raynaud’s and secondary amenorrhea.

It’s only over the past few years I have discovered meditation, breathwork and polyvagal practices as ways of activating my parasympathetic nervous system, strengthening my anterior cingulate cortex and shrinking my amygdala.

At the brow chakra we find the monkey mind and its constant chatter which keeps ever distracted and ever over-stimulated. Yet we also find the pineal gland and the third eye which are associated with intuition and second sight. There’s less science to explain the latter. I’ve found that when the monkey is quiet, when I meditate, when I journey, I can access depths of wisdom that are not available to the thinking mind and bring it back for others.

Location: Brow / Colour: Indigo / System: Brain / Endocrine: Pituitary and pineal / Sense: Sight / Faculty: Mind / Realm: Thought / Faculties: Thinking and intuition / Animals: Monkey and Owl

Cherry Blossoms Conti April 2019

I.
I seek you
where the petals
of magnolia fall
and cherry blossom
see you fleeing the ideal
of pale flesh

running into the woods
seeing yourself everywhere
dew beads on bluebells.

Doomed to be beautiful
you want to tear off your face.

II.
You want to sink your talons
into Lleu for whom you were made,

who acts like such a mummy’s boy
even though his mother disowned him,
refused to give him a name, weapons, a wife.
You hate this explanation for your being
and sate your hatred on loving Lleu

who did nothing wrong except be a man
in the wrong time and place.

III.
You do not know who Gronw is
until he brings you the stag’s head,
antlers shadowed on your bedroom wall,
until you wake knowing you have

a soul and weep for the first time.

Seeing clearly you choose your fate –
you will kill to have your own way.

Eyes large and wide honeyed beak:
“Tell me how can you be killed?”

IV.
Every Sunday you help to polish
the shaft of the poisoned spear,
try to restrain hysterical laughter
as you round up the goats by the river,
strip him, sponge him in the bath,
help him into that ludicrous position,
one foot on the goat one on the rim,
stark bollock naked shining like the sun.

When the spear strikes the sun falls
from the sky and flies away as an eagle
and you are left in darkness already
a creature of the night – Flower Face,

petals wilting in your marital bed,
flying free embracing your dark truth.

When Gwydion speaks your true name:
Blodeuwedd he does not know what he
called up, bound, and released.